New Codice Stradale Rules

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New Codice Stradale Rules

Post by Geotherm on Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:26 pm

These are not openly published.

1) Ensure your mobile phone is superglued to your ear so you do not miss a call.

2) The car vanity mirror must always be down to ensure your hair or makeup is perfect in case you get a facebook call.

3) Indicators must only be used as a last resort, as you must never let anyone know where you are going.

4) Speed limits must be ignored in all cases, the new regulations state you can increase them by at least 50% as they are only guidance.

5) White lines are to be ignored as they only let you know roughly where the road is after Cena in your headlights.

6) It is imperative that you overtake on blind bends, so all other drivers now have to carry plastic flowers and buckets of sand to clean up the mess you may cause.

7) Your handbag dog has to perch on your lap, as if you lose control it can take over.

Cool Ensure you travel as close to the vehicle in front to make sure you cannot be seen. At least if it has a camera then you are.

9) Try not to park in line in spaces, as your ass sticking out causes lots of problems to others, but your shopping is more important, or not getting wet as you may shrink.

10) Just stop anywhere in the middle of the road for a chat with a friend, or leave your door open for the same reason..

These are just a few points that I have picked up in the many years here and many recorded on dashcam. More would be welcome.

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Re: New Codice Stradale Rules

Post by Sagraiasolar on Mon Sep 03, 2018 11:37 am

... always approach a T junction at 90 mph so that no one knows if you are really going to stop. If you do stop then make sure your bonnet sticks out enough to make an obstruction.

If you travel with your pikey mates in an old banger or tatty van do not worry about police attention - just keep up the burglaries.
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Re: New Codice Stradale Rules

Post by Geotherm on Thu Sep 06, 2018 4:29 pm

Cyclists do not have any rules. They must go in pairs to talk around bends etc, so it is difficult to overtake. The lycra will keep them from getting injured....lol

If you try to overtake a car as it it is going too slow,then it must accelerate to try and stop you, as it would be loss of face.

Lights must not be used in bad weather conditions as that would let you know another driver is coming towards you and you must remain invisible.

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